The Dad couldn't find the thingy he wears on his arm that tells him what time it is for 2 days so he borrowed the mom's time thingy because she didn't need it since Max always tells her when it's time to feed the kitties, and he looked and looked for his time thingy and yesterday he found it under the bed and it had some little toothy marks on it, and you know what? They think I was playing with it! Max is the one who likes to treat things to a toothy death so I don't know why they think it was me, even though I like to play with thingies and carry them around in my mouth and sometimes leave them under a bed and the time thingy didn't have a toothy death, just a couple of pokey marks. No one was mad so I guess it's okay they think it was me, especially since it was.
Today I snoopervised while the Mom was getting dust off the big thingy with the TV in it and she said I was doing a very good job, so I tried to help more and move the cloth for her but she said that wasn't being helpful, so I grabbed it with my claws and ran away with it. She sighed real hard and said "well I guess that means I'm done" and I thought yep, now you're done so you can come play with me, but then she got out the sucky monster and made lots of noise. I didn't like that but I snoopervised anyway. She did a very good job and I think she deserved a crunchy treat, but she didn't get one, she just opened a can of that fizzy stuff she likes to drink instead. I would have liked a crunchy treat...
Last night I found a little ball on the floor and I pushed it with my paw and it made a tinkling sound, like jingle jingle jingle so I started rolling it around and it got really loud! Then the Mom got up and said "What are you doing? It's the middle of the night." I didn't say anything, I just showed her the ball I found and how good it rolls and jingles, and then she sighed really hard and went back to bed. When I got tired of that I looked out the back door and there was a kitty out there, and he went to the side of the house so I jumped on the kitchen counter and tried to look at him out the window there but the shade thingy was down so I had to hit it and stick my head through the slats and then the Mom came downstairs and said "What are you doing now?" but she saw my head in the slats and muttered something not nice but she opened it for me so I could see out but by then the kitty was gone so I got down and she said "You're taking lessons from Max, aren't you?" Then she went back to bed again and I decided that was a good time to run up and down the stairs and play Thundering Herd Of Elephants. Max decided to play, too! But I don't think the Mom appreciated that we were playing together, because I heard her say something about duct tape and furry little butts...
Max and I have a new game! It's called Thundering Herd Of Elephants and it can only be played at 2 in the morning because Max says that's when the game is the most fun and the most loud, and the whole goal of Thundering Herd Of Elephants is to run as fast as you and and be as loud as you can just using only your paws! To play, you have to start at the bottom of the stairs and run up, then down the hallway, then into the Mom's office where you tag the climbing trees so hard they go THUNK on the wall, then you run back down the hall and the stairs and do it all over again until the Mom gets up and says "Holy crap, you two sound like a thundering herd of elephants!" And then maybe she says she's going to duct tape your little paws together but she doesn't really mean it. Then you stop until she goes back to bed, after that you can do it all over again. Max says the more kitties who play this the better it is, so if you have lots of kitties in your family you should do this with all of them. It's terrific fun!
Ha Ha Ha Ha LOOKY!
I'm sorry I didn't blog in so long but I've been so busy since my birthday playing with my toys and then the Dad put up the Supreme Commander Kitty Tower and I've been playing on that with Max (even when he doesn't want to play) and then Max showed me something on Skeezix's blog and I've been using my internet time (and I don't get alot) to look for it at stores online -- I want Skeezix's stroller! Every morning when the Dad comes home from passing gas I try to get outside but he won't let me, but I think if I had one of these he and the Mom would take me for walks. I really, really want one but Max says he's not gonna give me the money and I don't get an allowance. Max says I have to write a book but that's a lot of words for a two year old to write, I think. How does a kitty get the stuff he wants when he can't get a job???
I had a very fun birthday yesterday. Thank you for all the birthday wishes, that made me smile a lot. Max was nice to me and played with me a little, even when I didn't feel like playing, he just jumped on top of me and tried to wrestle!
More pictures here
I got lots of presents! There's a new thingy to scratch and it's really all mine on account of Max not having claws, and some toys to chase, and REAL LIVE CATNIP!!! I told Max I would share that with him because not sharing the kitty crack is just wrong. The Mom says she's going to put it in a bigger thingy so it will grow and we can have fresh nip all the time!
And for dinner the Mom let me have a whole can of the extra special Stinky Goodness Fancy Feast. Even Max got a whole can. That's ok because on his birthday I'll get to eat the special birthday dinner, too, he says that's the way it works, we all get to have it, except the People never seem to want to eat the good stuff.
Max says I'm a grownup kitty now and I didn't want to be all grown up because I want to be the little kitty but then he said that was ok, I can be grownup but I don't have to act old, I can just be myself. So later when he's not looking, I'm going to jump on him, 'cause that's what myself does.
Happy Birthday to me!
I'm in between the big pillows the Mom uses. She leaves them there all day for me, on account of I love them so much.
Tonight I was standing on the Mom's lap saying "Please can we have snack? I'm awfully hungry" and you know what Max did? He walked over and jumoed in her lap too and I thought we were gonna sit there together and be nice like Grr, Midnight, and Cocoa are in their laundry basket but he head butted me onto the floor. That wasn't very nice.
Oh and you know how the Mom knows it's me chewing on her shoelaces? She catched me doing it a couple of times. I don't know whay it's a bad thing, it's not like I'm eating her whole shoe. I only do it because it seems very important and I like to do very important things.
The Mom says I have to stop chewing on her shoelaces when she's sleeping, but when she's awake they're on her feet and I can't get to them, so how am I supposed to chew on them if I don't do it when she's asleep???
yay! the M's tagged me! So I did it, I answered all the questions and here they are!
A) Four places I have lived:
1. In a cage in a bad place, called a K-I-L-L shelter
2. The Espeeceeay, they saved me
3. In an apartment with Max and the Mom and the Dad and the Other Dad
4. In 2 houses!
B) Four things I love to watch:
1. Birdies outside the window
2. the little red dot zooming on the floor
3. toilet water, just like Max!
4. Stnky Goodness as my face gets close to it
C) Four places I have been outside my home:
1. The stabby place
2. Outside in my harness
3. The car thingy
4. Um...I don't know of 4
D) Four websites I visit daily:
I'm not allowed to play unsnoopervised on the Net, so I just go to cat blogs
E) Four of my favorite foods:
1. Stinky Goodness
2. Temptations crunchy treats
3. Fancy Feast crunchy food
4. Um...that's it
F) Four places I would rather be right now:
Wy would I wanna be somewhere else? There's food here and stairs to run on and the Mom and the Dad and the Other Dad and Max!
G) Four toys I have owned and played with:
1. Mousies!
2. A fevvur thingy
3. a Cat dancer thingy
4. The Mom's fingers, which aren't very tasty
H) Four nicknames my staff have tried to assign me:
1. Little Man
2. Buddah Butt
3. Sweetykins
4. Sweetcheeks
I) Regarding Catnip:
Love it
It's nice
Could take it or leave it
Don't like it or can't have it
J) Regarding Cat Grass:
Love it
It's nice
Could take it or leave it
Don't like it or can't have it
K) First four things I'd buy after winning the lottery:
1. A house for the Mom and the Dad
2. A house for the Other Dad, as long as he'll come back to see me
3. Shrimp for Max
4. Crunchy treats for ALL OF US!
L) Four things I do besides eat, sleep, and litterbox:
1. I run around like my butt is on fire
2. I jump up to the highest place I can get
3. I play fetch
4. I jump on Max and make him really mad
M) Four things I want to do this summer:
1. Find my balls. I think they're under the frigidator.
2. Learn to speak Spanish
3. Figger out what's happening on general hospital
4. Make Max like me
N) My four most prized possessions that have limited value to anyone else:
But everything I have is important to everyone!
O) What I’m going to do before tomorrow is over:
1. Take a bath
2. Make max mad
3. Make the Mom say "Ohhhh you're so cute!"
P) Which of the following is your favorite place to hide and play?
Paper bags
Plastic bags
Boxes
Other (please describe)
Q) Four other "pets" your staff have kept with you:
Max
and a woofy, but that's all I can amember.
R) Four furiends I tag to respond:
I don't know!
Today Max got up on the wall thingy that I like to play on but he wasn't too sure about what to do once he was up there so I ran up and was going to show him but he wouldn't listen, so I jumped down on the bookcase to wait until he wanted me to show him how to get down, because he really didn't know how to get down from there and I do it all the time, but then he wouldn't let me show him, so the Mom got some crunchy treats out and showed him the bag, and man, he figured it out really fast!
Looky! The Dad had the clicky-flashy box today and he pointed it at me and took my picture!
I think in the second one I was gonna sing and was warming up with LaLaLaLaLa. Or maybe it was just a hairball.
I got new grass! I was taking a nap and sleeping really good but I heard the Mom and the Dad come home so I went downstairs to say Hi and Feed Me, and there it was, right by the fireplace, a whole new thing of grass for me to chew on! There's a grass fairy! That's like Santa, but I think the grass fairy has boobs.
I was taking a nap today and when I waked up I went into the Mom's office and this was there waiting for me! Max was looking at it but he was more like "Eh, it's a cube" but I wanted to get inside and play so I did and there's a dangly thing at the top I can play with and I can curl up in there and look out of it, and the Mom said "I thought you would like that. Lots of the other kitties have them and they seem to like it" and she was right I do!
Max wants to know where his present is because he doesn't think that's a good present and if I like it that means it's mine and he wants a present too dammit. Oh, but I'm not supposed to say dammit. He wants crunchy treats but the Mom said "Not right now." I would like a crunchy treat too but I'll go play in my cube instead.
This morning the Mom got up when it was still dark out and went into the giant litterbox room and then she came out and went back to bed and my tummy felt a little funny so I yakked right there in the hallway where she'd be sure to see it later but she wasn't asleep so she heard me and came out to clean it up and I was afraid she would be mad becuase she wanted to go back to sleep, but she said that was okay, she just LOVES cleaning up kitty barf before she's even away so I did a good thing!
I went into the giant literbox room with the Mom today, and she left a cabinet open for a minute so I peeked inside and I found a whole thingy full of stuff to play with! I know I shoulda asked but I didn't and when she wasn't looking I grabbed one and stuffed in just under the cabinet thingy so I could look at it better later, and then later when she was in her office I went back and looked at it again and I couldn't figure it out but it had a pretty yellow wrapper on it so I pulled the wrapper off and this THING popped out so I showed Max and he said it wasn't a toy, it was something to clean with and I asked how he knew that and he said the bag it was in said s-a-n-i-t-a-r-y and that means clean, so I figured since I took the Mom's cleaning thingy without asking I better do what it says to so I rubbed it all over the floor and cleaned up lots of dust, and then the Mom came in and saw and said "Ohhhh, sweetie, that's not a toy" and she took it away and put it in the trash, but that's ok because I cleaned the floor!
I snoopervised again! The Dad and the Mom brought home this big box with a thingy in it that Max says will make them say bad words for a while and then it will be a coat rack but mostly we'll be able to sit on it and look cool, and the Dad said he needed to put it together dammit, so I knew he might need help so I snoopervised for him.
He's still putting it together but I needed a break because it's taking a long long time and I got hungry and hoped there was some crunchy food in the dish but there's not.
I think I killed it.
I eated it almost down to nothing, and now there's not enough grass to munch on! I asked the Mom if she would make it grow taller but she didn't answer, she just said "Yep, you did a number on that, didn't you?" I'm going to ask the Dad if he'll make it grow more for me. He can do it. He made it grow the first time. If he doesn't do it I'll have to ask Max to buy me more grass. He would do that, wouldn't he???
