The Adventures Of Buddah Pest

King of the run-on sentence...

I saw another woofy today! It was outside this morning when the Dad was reading the paper and Max and I were sitting by the window so we could feel the breeze. I wanted to go outside and play with it, but the man who had the woofy took it away. And Max said I was insane anyway, that we don't play with woofies. We hiss at them. But I really think I'd like to play with a woofy, even if Max doesn't like them. I think he's just mad because he used to have a woofy of his own and he misses it.

See? I got to play with the balled up paper! I was going to share it with Max, but he wasn't interested. The Mom says I look almost small in this picture. But...

Here I am asking for a new box. I really need a new box to play in.

Looky. I need a new box 'cause I'm getting kind of long and it don't fit me anymore!

Max says that tonight we're going to sing! We're going to do it because today is the Mom's birthday. I don't know what that means, but if we get to sing I'm all for it! And there's balled up paper that I get to play with. Max says to leave it in the living room for now and we'll play with it after the Mom goes to sleep. We might even take it back there and play with it on the bed so she can have fun too!

You know what Max did to me? When I was running up and down the hall as fast as I could, trying to catch the red buggy the Dad makes run from me, he hid in the entry way to the Other Dad's room, and when I went by, he jumped out to scare me! And it did! He jumped out with his paws up and said BOO! and I almost peed right there in the hall! But I wasn't mad, it was funny. But I keep looking before I walk by there just to make sure he's not there again!

I tried to be really cute for the Mom last night, but Max says sitting on her face isn't being cute. He says it's really funny, but not cute and not helpful when she's sad. So I asked him what to do, and he said "Take a bath!" so I did. I took a long long bath and I let Max help me get behind my ears, and then I curled up on top of her just before she went to sleep.

I purred really hard and rubbed my cheek on her face, and that made her happy. So now I'm all nice and clean and the Mom doesn't seem so sad today. Maybe I won't have to take a bath for a wole week now!

The Mom is very sad tonight because she losted a friend. I was going to help her look because I think her friend is with the green mousey I lost, but Max said not to, and to just do the cute thing and rub my face on hers and meow real soft. She needs to sit down so I can do that. Max already did, he got in her lap and rubbed his face all over hers, and he even purred. Then he said I didn't see that and if I did he's going to throw me off the climbing thingy, so I didn't see that. But it made the Mom smile so I don't know what his problem is.

Max likes to give me baths, but boy, if you try to give him one! He growled at me and hit me on my little head! But that's ok, because when he was asleep on top of the climbing thingy, I snuck up there, curled up, and used his butt as a pillow!

Can you see me in there?

Max was in the basket and I wanted to get in with him, but he got mad and jumped out.

So I got to have to all to myself! The Dad pointed the flashy thing at me, but the thingy in the basket is as black as I am!

I'm not sure what the thingy in the basket is, but the Mom says it's a good thing it was already dirty...

All I wanted to do was sleep, but the Mom had the flashy thing and pointed it at me. She likes it when I look at the flashy thing, so I looked up.

I was kind of sleepy, but she made it go flash and then she laughed. Max was on the other side of the room and told me to act like I was stuck up, so I did.

She said I was a handsome boy, and she tried to flash it at Max, but all he would let her flash it at was his butt.

The Mom wants to know who lit my butt on fire...the Big Kitty thinks that's funny, but I keep looking and there's nothing on my butt! So the only thing I can do is keeping running around as fast as I can, and maybe I'll find the fire. I musta dropped it somewhere.

I teethed the Mom's funny hat!
Clicky and see the whole picture!

Guess what? The Mom and the Dad found out that I'm 2 weeks older than they thought I was! Since I got nootered, the place they got me from gave them a piece of paper that says I'm their kitty forever and forever, and says I was born in the middle of March, not the beginning of April like they had figured. So that means I'm TWO WEEKS bigger, and TWO WEEKS smarter!

I tried to tell the Big Kitty that I was 2 whole weeks smarter, but I don't think he heard me, because he pushed me off the climbing tower.

I got to see a WOOFY today! I was looking out the window and there he was, on a balcony in the other building! Max says he's smaller than me, and he just goes woof woof woof all the time. And Max says he's tried to get the woofy to jump, but it won't listen to him. I'd like to go play with the woofy, but I don't think he likes us very much. Maybe if he jumps we can go outside and meet him.

Looky! I got to hug the Big Kitty!

Oh. Max was not quite right. Getting nootered is NOT ten kinds of fun.

I only counted like 3 kinds of fun. First I got to go outside with the Mom and she took me to the place with the nice people. That was kind of fun. Then the nice people let me take a long nap, and they petted me while I went to sleep. That was kind of fun. And later on they played with me because I didn't want to be in the plastic thingy anymore. That was kind of fun.

But after my nap, my butt hurt. I can't sit very well and I can't jump very well. And I was REALLY hungry. The Mom closed the bedroom door last night and I think she forgot that she put all the food back there, and she forgot to feed me before she took me outside. I just got to eat, but my butt still hurts.

All in all, I don't think I want to get nootered again. It was only 3 kinds of fun, and those weren't even really good kinds of fun. Just little kinds of fun. I can get people to play with me any day.

Just so you know, if they say you get to get nootered, it's not worth the excitement. Especially since your butt hurt after.

Lookit the buggy!
I tried and tried and tried, but I couldn't catch it.
It's just too fast!

Guess what? I'm 4 months old now, and because I'm such a big boy, I'm gonna get NOOTERED! Max says that's TEN kinds of fun, and that I should make sure I take lots of baths this week to be all nice and clean, because I'm going to get to go someplace on Friday to get nootered! Everyone is all excited about it, especially the Mom. In fact, when she was asleep last night I jumped on her head and rubbed my dangly stuff on her cheek, and she said "I can't wait for you to get nootered!" Me either!

If I'm not supposed to chew on the Dad's things, why does he leave them right there for me to play with? I didn't know I wasn't allowed to chew up his special ear thingies or the little worms that hang off the back of his speakers. Chewing is my most favorite playing thing. If it's there, I'm gonna chew on it!

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