This morning I sat at the bottom of the stairs and called out because the Mom was upstairs, and I said "I can't find a mousie to play with. Will you come find one for me?" I had to say it three or four times before she leaned over the stair rail thingy and said, "I can't come play right now, sweetie, I'm busy," so I cocked my head and thinked for a second and said "I just want a mousie. PLEASE?" and she said "Can't you play by yourself?" so I went up the stairs halfway and said "I can play by myself but I need a mousie!" so she started to come down the stairs. I ran for the kitchen because that's the last place I saw a mousie and she followed me and said "Oh! Do you want a treat?" and because I'm not stupid I said "Yes, please." So me and Max got a treat! And then the Mom said "I'm going back upstairs" and I was about to be all sad because I still didn't know where one of my mousies was, but she turned the corner and I heard her rattle one and she said "Here, can you play with this for a while by yourself?" and I said "yes!" and she threw it for me and I chased it. Max says sometimes People have to think an idea is all their own before they do it and it doesn't matter because not only did I finally get a mousie to play with, I got treats for both of us.
The Mom came home today but I don't know where she had been but when she opened the door I came running to see her and she said "Buddah! What have you been doing, Little Man?" and then she closed the door and reached down to give me head skritches.
That's when she saw that there was a big clump of Max-fur sticking out of my mouth. And then she said "What did you do...?" and she sighed real hard and went to find Max, mumbling something about he probably had a huge clump of fur missing but then she fouund him and he was ok. I didn't pull out a giuant clump of Max's fur. Just lots of littles ones, all at once.
I don't think she was very happy with me. I don't think Max was, either.
I was just playin', honest!
The Mom and the Dad keep saying it's too hot but it feels just right to me. Max says they mean outside, so why don't they stay inside? He says that's because People are confusing things and we'll hurt our brains if we try too hard to understand them so I think I'll just go sit on the climbing thing and wait for snack time.
Looky! I was the very first picture that the Mom took with her new camera!
I helped her take it out of the box and then upload all the stuffs she needed to onto the computer and then I helped her figure out how to get pictures out of the camera. I helped with that by sitting on the back of the chair and saying "Uhoh" every time she said a bad word.
She and the Dad took a lot of pictures when they went outside today. I wish we could see stuff like that from the window. I think it's all hidden by the fence.
Oh! This morning I was really really really hungry and when the Mom fed us I scarfed my food down so fast that Max wasn't even halfway done with his. And Max likes his food so that says how hungry I was. The Mom was watching and she said, "You're a hungry boy today," and I looked at her and said "yes I am!" so she said I must need more to eat, and she got out some crunchy food and gave me a whole handful!
Max looked up from his Stinky Goodness so she put just a couple of crunchies on his plate and that made him happy. He wasn't really really really hungry like I was but he thinks it's only fair if he gets a little crunchy if I do. And I was still so hungry that I ate the crunchy food really fast, and was done before Max was!
I was still hungry but the Mom said "Let that sit in your stomach a little bit and if you're still hungry in an hour, I'll sneak you a treat." So I waited and waited and you know what? I wasn't hungry later. I still hope she sneaks me a treat, though. When Max is sleeping this afternoon if I ask her really nice she'll get me something to eat. She'd give Max a treat, too, but she says he really doesn't need it and if he gets one early in the day then he can't have a bite of their dinner and he really likes to get a tiny bite of dinner if they have something good, like last night they had chicken and it was really good and he was a good boy while they ate so he got a bite. I got a bite too but I wasn't good boy. I was just asleep when they ate.
Looky! This is what you get when you're clever and take your collar off! Well, you get this plus a new collar, which wasn't what I wanted but I still got this!
It's a giant mousie! It's the biggest mousie I've ever seen!
After I looked and sniffed and bited it a little the Dad hanged it for me so I could really get at it. It didn't bite back or anything. And I got tired of it, so the Mom had this envelope and she had more mousies! Lots and lots and lots of mousies! I love little mousies, especially the mousies that go rattle rattle rattle and all the mousies go rattle rattle rattle! I got to sniff them and bat at them, then the Mom put most of them away for later but left 3 of them out for me. And Max got to try to play with the big mousie, but he wasn't much interested. He didn't even seem interested in the little mousies so they're all mine!
I winned a game I didn't even know I was playing! I kept pulling on my collar and getting it stuck on my teeths, and the Mom kept getting it off for me and then she would tighten it up but I'd get it with my paw and then pull it out over my teeths again, and after I did it like five times she took the collar off and said "Ok, you win."
YAY!
Do I get a prize for that? I think when you win you're supposed to get a prize. Or a treat. Maybe I'll get some crunchy treats tonight for being a clever boy. The Mom likes it when I'm clever or silly. And I don't have a collar on, but Max does!
Looky!
Click image to biggify
Another roll of paper towels got a toothy death! They were on the counter and I carried them into the living room and I killed them! The Dad took my picture with my kill, and the mom said "ohhhhh you're anaughty boy, Buddah" but she didn't get mad or anything. Max says if they don't want me to kill things they should put them where I can't get to them.
There's a box of cheesy crackers on the counter and I think I want to try to kill that next. That will taste better than the paper towels. I like cheesy crackers a lot, and last night I tried to stick my head in the box but the Mom said, "No, Buddah, that's not cat food" but I said, "anything is cat food if I eat it" and she said I was cute so she broke a cracker in half and let me lick the cheese off and then nibble it a little.
I can't wait until the Mom and the Dad are both upstairs so I can hunt!
This morning I wanted in the Other Dad's room, but the door was closed, so I sat there and meowed and meowed and the Mom said "Buddah, be quiet, he's asleep" but I still wanted in the room so I didn't be quiet. I meowed and meowed and when that didn't work I tried to open the door by myself and it made a lot of noise and then the Other Dad opened the door. All that work and the door was open and I could go in and see him and sleep on his bed or look out his window! But I ran away instead. Because that's what kitties do.
Hahahahaha know what I just did? I was on the very top of the climbing thingy, and I stood there, and I threw up and it went everywhere! The Mom said Oh gross and then said it was worth a gold medal in projectile hariball hurling! And I think it bothered her even more cause the Dad wasn't here to clean it up so she had to! I'm not sick I just had hair in my tummy and it wanted out. It came out with dinner, too! Now it smells all beefy in here!
I gave Max the best thing I could think of for a late birthday present. We had shrimp as a treat last night and he loves shrimp more than anything in the world so I let him have half of mine. And tonight the Mom gave us each a little bite of chicken from their dinner, and I let Max have half of that too. He says he's not mad at me because I didn't even know it was his birthday and I can't go to the store anyway, but he was really happy to have the shrimp and the chicken, so he won't growl at me tonight if I get too close.
Oh. I feel bad. Yesterday was Max's birthday and we all forgetted. I don't think he forgetted but he didn't say anything. But he was in a really bad mood last night so I bet that's why. I hope the Mom and the Dad get him something special today to make him feel better. How can anyone forget Max's birthday? Max is MAX!
I came in 2nd in high jumping in the the Kitty Lympics today! I was also in the climbing event, but I got stuck partway up and didn't win anything in it. But that's ok! It was 152 kinds of fun (Max said so!) and I just liked playing with all the other kitties.
Max didn't win anything in his event, sumo wrestling, but he says that's ok. He didn't train very much. He wrestled Cheese, and he says "Cheese whizzed all over me." Hahahahaha! He just liked being with the other kitties, too, even though I bet he won't admit that.
The Kitty Lympics was so much fun I hope we do it again next year! Max says we might have to wait 4 years, but then he'll be too old for it or he might even be dead!
There was a kitty in the back yard today, one of the RUDE kitties, and the Mom was outside sitting in a chair and she was NOT letting me out no matter how much I asked, and the rude kitty came up to her and started rubbing on her legs and against the chair. The kitty was being all nice and the Mom was saying what a good girl she was (and we didn't even know she was a girl!) and how pretty she was, and Max was at the back door watching all this but he wasn't trying to make the rude kitty go away, he just watched while the Mom was nice to the rude kitty. She told Max to be nice and then the girl kitty walked over to the door where Max was being nice, and you know what she did? Do you? She raised her front paws and swinged them, and HISSED at Max! And he didn't even do anything!
The Mom clapped her hands real loud and made the girl kitty go away and said "well I guess she wasn't such a nice little girl after all," and Max said "Well, DUH, we told you that like a hundred times," but the Mom just picked up her book and started reading again. That girl kitty really isn't very nice at all and Max said she's a something-something but I'm not allowed to repeat that.
Ohhh...yesterday, I wanted a mousie to play with but I couldn't find one so I called upstairs and asked very nicely for someone to come find one for me but no one ever came, so I gave up and was all sad and didn't have anything to do. I thought maybe no one was home but when Max came down he said there were people upstairs, they just didn't come down so I thought maybe no one wanted me to play with a mousie.
But in a little bit the Other Dad came down and he did some stuff and I wasn't really looking, but when I did look he was standing halfway up the stairs with his hands together, and he shook them a little bit, and when he opened them mousies rained from the cieling! I think there were 152 of them even though Max says there was only about 12, but there were mousies in every color I ever saw, and some of my favorite mousies were there.
It was really loud when they hit the floor and that kind of scared me a tiny bit so I ran into another room but I cam right back and started to play with the mousies.
You know what? I think the Other Dad knows magic! He can make it rain mousies! Max says that's all well and good, but he'll be impressed when the Other Dad can make it rain crunchy treats and Stinky Goodness.
Ok. I don't mind wrestling with Max when I know it's coming but I don't like him being all stealthy and knocking me down the stairs when I'm trying to lick my fun parts. He did it again and I asked what he thought he was doing and he said "I'm being all in Timmy Datin'." Well, he doesn't need to be Timmy because there's already a perfectly good Timmy, and whoever Timmy is datin' is none of Max's business and it would be very rude for him to pretend to be Timmy just to be datin' Timmy's girlfriend. That's a LAW. A nice kitty does not try to date another kitty's girlfriend, and that means you don't rub foreheads together, you don't watch birdies out the window together, and you really don't sniff each others' butts, because that would be rude and not fair to the kitty who was doing all the datin'. So Max needs to stop trying to be Timmy Datin' and find his own girlfriend, and stop knocking me down the stairs when I'm paying attention to my fun bits.
Do I really have to help Max practice his sumo wrestling just because he's doing it for the Kitty Lympics? He's not helping me practice for climbing and high jumping. I know he wants to win but I don't believe that sumo wrestling means pushing another kitty off the top stair to the bottom.
Max had to go to the stabby place today and before they went he gotted a pill to make him not so growly but it didn't work very well so the bald guy stabbed him with something else to make him really loopy and it worked real good! Max could hardly walk when he came home and his eyes were all funny and I think he kind of liked it. That was a million hours ago and he's still pretty loopy. I been leaving him alone because the Mom and the Dad said I had to, but I'm having lots of fun just watching him. I bet he's hungry, though, because at dinner time he was locked in a room with the Dad and I ate all by myself and all he's had since he got home was a little chicken water the Mom gave him because he hid somewhere and they couldn't find him so she opened a can to make him unhide and then said it wouldn't be fair to not let him have any, so she gave him the water and a few tiny bites of chicken but not too many so he wouldn't barf. I hope he gets to eat soon.
I missed my GOTCHA day! I forgot about it and it went by and no one else remembered either! Or maybe Max did and that's why he's been so growly. Saturday was 1 whole year since the Mom and the Dad and the Other Dad brought me home. I don't even really remember what it was like before they adopted me. But I guess it's okay that we all forgot, because no one even rememebers what Max's GOTCHA day is.
Ha Ha Ha Max doesn't know it yet but I heard the Mom and the Dad say that he's going to the stabby place tomorrow and get stabbed and maybe even have some of his blood sucked right out of his body! The Dad just went over there to get something that will make Max all drunk and not so growly so the bald guy at the stabby place can look at Max without losing an eye or his nose. I ike the people at the stabby place but Max thinks they are so evil that they should be called Stabby 666 Place. I don't get it but he thinks that's really funny. He's in a better mood today, he hasn't growled at me even once yet. He says the day isn't over yet, though.
