The Adventures Of Buddah Pest

King of the run-on sentence...

Looky!
The Mom made my blog look dfferent!

I got a time out today! Max and I were playing, and we were being really loud, and he was growling, and I was trying to ride him, and the Mom got mad and then made me go stay in a room with the Dad until we calmed our asses down! I tried and tried but since no one told me what an asses is I couldn't calm it down, so I took a nap instead.

Oh. I got locked in a closet today. I was in there for a long, long time--the Mom said it was for FIFTEEN minutes! It was dark and I didn't like it at all, so I tried to open the door myself, but I couldn't do it so then I tried to jump and knock the door open, but all that did was be very noisy and the Mom could hear it but she thought I was in another room scratching the wall and kept saying "Stop doing that, Buddah. Don't make me come in there, Buddah." Well I didn't stop it so she came to look, and didn't see me in the other room. So I did it again and she realized she locked me in the closet! She said she was sorry and then maybe I'd learn to not go in there. Maybe I will, maybe I won't. But I bet I do.

Santa camed! He brought us lots of toys, too! There was a BIG box of Max's favorite crunchy treats and a new octopus toy and a blue thingy with feathers on it and a mousie that goes WHIRRRRRR when the Mom or the Dad or the Other Dad pulls its tail and that was just in the great big sock! After we gotted our toys and treats the Mom and the Dad and the Other Dad ripped paper off stuff that was under the tree and made balls and threw it for us to chase! I didn't know what I wanted to play with the most. At first I had to play with my new octopus toy because I just HAD to, but then I started playing with the paper and it was LOTS of fun! Max played too!

Max and I were real good last night waiting for Santa. Well, mostly we were good. At 4 in the morning, and I know it was 4 because the Mom said "Max, it's four in the morning!" Max stood on the stairs and started singing really really loud. Then after the Dad was awake but he wasn't going downstairs so we couldn't either to see what Santa left, I got all excited and started running up and down the hall. I ran so fast and so hard that I kind of threw the bedroom door open and sailed onto the bed and waked the Mom up. But she wasn't mad! She just grumbled "You're not excited, are you?" and then got up! And that's when we got to go down and see what Santa left!

We gotted so tired after running around and playing this morning that we had to take a nap, and the Mom and the Dad and the Other Dad went out for a while to see a movie whatever a movie is and then when they came home I ran around a whole bunch more, and then I gotted to eat HAM. I gotted turkey too but I liked the ham better.

Max says it's a good thing Christmas is only once a year because if it were more I would explode all over the place.

I hope everyone else had a Merry Christmas. And Happy Hannukah, cause today is day 1 and Max says that's EIGHT days of fun!

SANTA COMES TONIGHT!!! SANTA COMES TONIGHT!!! SANTA COMES TONIGHT!!!

This morning, I waked the Mom up by trying to get the thingy on the window open, and she picked me up and put me outside the door, but I went back in and did it again, so she picked me up and put me out the door and then she shutted it! I couldn't get back in! So she went to bed, and you know what? Max was in there and then HE got up and tried to open the thingy on the window! So she gave up and got out of bed and got dressed and said we were both little poops but she used another word but I don't think she was really mad.

Then when she was downstairs Max said to me "Guess what?" and I said "What?" and he said "Tomorrow is Christmas, so Santa will come tonight while everyone is asleep!"

Well I got so excited I thought I was going to pop so I had to run. I ran down the hall and into a bedroom and I turned around and ran back down the hall and then down the stairs and through the room with the table that has balls on it and into another room and then the kitchen and then the room where the tree is, and then I had to do it all over again! But the next time I went from the room with the table that has balls into another room I knocked over a footstool thingy and a lamp, so the Mom said "Buddah, stop!" I had to run back upstairs because I was still going to pop, but I ran into the room where the Dad was playing with his computer and sat in the window. She camed up the stairs to tell him that I'm insane but that I did't break the lamp. But I can't help it because SANTA COMES TONIGHT!!!

Max says there's only three days until Santa brings us presents! And you know what? He's going to bring something for the Mom and the Dad and the Other Dad, too! And what's funny? Santa's going to stick their presents inside socks! I asked him if we needed to get some socks out of the dirty clothes basket after they all go to sleep because they don't just leave their socks lying around unless one of them sees I want to play with one, but Max said no and then showed me these giant socks they hung up on a door. Those are the biggest socks I have ever seen! I think Max and I could both get into one of them together! I tried to reach up and play with the biggest sock but the Mom saw and said "No no Buddah, we don't play with that." Max turned around and said "well we do" but I don't think she heard him. Then later on she was wrapping a present for some people I never seen before and I helped her! I tried to bite the paper and I touched it with my paw and it stuck to me, and she said "You are such a big help, Little Man." And then she wrapped a present for someone I meeted a while back and was a little scared of, but she still let me help. Then later she made Max take a medicine for his bad tummy and gave us really good Stinky Goodness, and Max said that today is almost over, so tomorrow it will only be TWO days til Santa comes, and that's only about 20 sleeps! But one thing he doesn't know, do I have to take a bath for Christmas?

I was on the bed with the Mom and I saw Max in his bed and jumped down to give him a hug and you know what he did? He threw his paw around my neck and made me stay there while he licked my head ALL OVER! I kept trying to wiggle away but he wouldnt let go and licked and licked and nibbled until my head was all wet! The Mom didn't even stop him! She just laughed and said "You just got kitty noogies, Little Man." I didn't think it was funny at all.

Oh! Oh! Oh! We gotted presents! Looky! Max maked a whole page for everyone to see!

THANK YOU SECRET SANTA PAWS!

It's really hard to get behind the tree now. There are all kinds of shiny boxes under it and they block my way. I'd like to get back there but I'd have to climb on the shiny boxes and Max says that would really get me in trouble because my claws might rip them open, and they're presents for the Mom and the Dad and the Other Dad and they want them to stay unripped open until Christmas. Max says none of them are for us but that's ok because Santa will bring us presents. I wanted to know why the Mom and the Dad and the Other Dad gotted presents already and Max says they like to get stuff for each other but they're too old for Santa to bring them anything more than a teethy cleaning thingy and maybe some candy. He says we get Santa presents because we're still young. I asked him when we would be too old for Santa to bring us stuff and he said not to worry about it because to the Mom and the Dad and the Other Dad we'll always be young enough and that's what Santa goes by. He said there used to be a dog who got stuff from Santa right up until he went to the Rainbow Bridge. I wanted to know where that was but Max says that's not for little kitties to worry about, all I have to think about is what Santa might bring me. I think about that but I'm really thinking about how I can get behind the tree again!

Max was really nice to me while he was esplaining stuff, but then he jumped on me and bit me on the neck. I said "Santa can see you do that!" and he said "Santa will appreciate it." That's when I cried really loud for the Mom to hear and Max gotted in trouble! She said "No biting!" and Max meowed right back at her, he said, "Kiss my furry black butt!" but she just turned around and walked away!

I don't think she listens to Max very much.

I bited the tree.
I couldn't help it.
But it doesnt taste very good.

Max is mad because I won't climb the tree. I want to, but the Mom and the Dad both said "No!" and I don't want them to be mad at me. I don't want Max to be mad at me either, but they're bigger than both of us.

I like to get under the tree look up because it's a sparkly. But I don't like to get in trouble so I'm trying hard to not play with it.

The hanging thingies on it are very pretty, though, and I don't know how long I can go without taking one off and batting it around. I hope if I do the Mom and Dad won't get too mad.

Looky!
We gotted the tree!
There's thingies on it to bat around, and it does sparkly things at night. Its fun to loo at and sit under, but I haven't tried to climb up it yet. Max says to wait to do that. First I have to make the Mom and the Dad think I don't want to.

There's other pictures of us too. Max showded the link of his blog but if you didn't see it the pictures are right here. I like the new table because it has balls I can play with, but you better not get on it when the Mom or the Dad are playing with the balls or you get owies. We don't get yeled at for getting on the table because the Mom says it's a cheap assed table and we can't hurt it. Max says Oh Yes We Can!

Max and I are trying to count how many sleeps there are until Santa comes. He thinks it's a bajrillion, but I think it's only 52.

There were new people in the house today! I wanted to meet them better, but honestly, I was a little afraid. Max says they're the Dad's parents and I should be nice to them, but I wasn't sure so I kept running away from them. Max likes them and he went into the living room to say hi and rub on their legs. The Dad's dad brought this really big thingy that makes noise sometimes. There's a picture of it here. I'm not allowed to get near it. I got to sniff it once but that was it. I would like to explore it some more but if I do the Mom is going to reach down my throat and grab my tail from the inside and turn me inside out! I don't think I would like that very much. And oh! She said they're going to bring the tree inside soon! Max says I can have fun playing with it instead of the big noise thingy!

Today the Mom and the Dad moved stuff around, so it's like a whole new place again! There are lots more places to jump and run and it's at least 5 kinds of fun. I tried to count them but I can only count to 3 but I'm pretty sure it's at least 5. Max wasn't happy about it but I bet he's going to like it later. When the Mom was trying to go up the stairs he plopped right down in front of her on a stair and wouldn't move. She called him a little poop but she used a bad word and not poop, but she was laughing so I don't think she was mad. Max says he's going to poop on her pillow but I don't believe him. I think he's going to make it all toothy instead!

Oh Oh Oh Max telled me about SANTA CLAWS today! He said he learned about Santa from Timmy last year and that Timmy was right! There's this old guy that goes into kitty's houses on Chrisymas and gives them presents if they've been good! He said we've been as good as kitties who like to bite each other can be so we'll get a new toy! I asked when Chrisymas was and he said a few weeks, and that's a million and a half sleeps!

Oh oh oh! And we might get a tree INSIDE the house! He says we're not SUPPOSED to climb on it or play with it or chew on it but the Mom and the Dad and the Other Dad can't watch it all the time, so we'll get to. I can't wait to see a tree inside the house! And And And he says there will be THINGIES on the tree to bat around and play with! If we di it right we can get them off the tree and bat them around on the floor!

I'm so exicted I have to go to the litterbox before I pee right here!


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