The Adventures Of Buddah Pest

King of the run-on sentence...

Yesterday I was upstairs and the Mom was downstairs and my tummy was just a little bit upset but it came on so fast I didn't have time to get downstairs where there is no white carpet just pretend-wood floors so I started horking and she called out "Who's throwing up?" but I couldn't answer because I was busy horking my breakfast up, and you'd think she would understand that because I've seen her hork her toenails up and it's not a pretty sight and I bet she couldn't talk then either, so when I didn't say "It's me, Buddah" she came up the stairs and saw that I had barfed up my deep dark brown breakfast all over the almost white carpet and I was afraid I was going to get in trouble but I didn't run because I'm a man cat now, I stood there and was willing to take whatever punishment I was gonna get for ruining the alost white carpet, but she didn't get mad she just said "Ohhh poor baby" and then she made the Dad clean it up because 1) kitty barfs makes her gag and 2) she's not stupid, so he cleaned it up and got the barf machine thingy out and put it on the spots where I horked, and pretty soon they were all gone but they both said it didn't matter on account of we're gonna do the m-word and the lady that owns the house won't own it by then, and who f$^#%@&g cares what the bank thinks.

I felt a whole lot better after I was done horking.

Happy New Year!


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