Oh No this morning I was in the bedroom and the Dad was asleep and I was just snooping around the floor and this THING fell off the bed onto my head and it scared me a little so I grabbed it with my claws and I bit it. I bite it really hard and then I heard the Dad say LOTS of bad words and when I looked up HIS HAND WAS LEAKING and he was really really mad at me so I ran away and hid from him because I was afraid he was going to bite me back but later he gave me crunchy treats so I don't think he was too mad but later the Mom said "If that gets infected we'll have to take you to the doctor" and Max said that was really bad because if that happens they're going to CUT HIS HAND OFF and if they cut his hand off how will he give me crunchy treats in the morning?
Everyone knows that the bed with the fuzzy blanket of the two long pillows is mine to nap on during the day even though Max sometimes gets up there too, but he doesn't take up much room so I don't mind, but it's mine and I count on it, so when I went to take a nap and the Mom was there hogging all the best places, well, that's when I jumped up and smacked her on the head with my paw four or five times and said "MOVE" but she just laughed and said "Sweetie, you can have the bed later" but that wasn't what I wanted to hear and it's NOT FAIR and I missed my nap!
I'm still very very busy because now I have a new job aside from being the Paper Holder Downer. You see, the Dad has this thing stuck to his face every night and it's called a See-Pap and Max says it's blowing lots and lots of air into the Dad and that if he doesn't blow some of it out he's going to just fill up with air and pop, so I decided I would make sure he blows some of the air out, so last night I walked across him lots of times because I knew if he woke up he would blow air out, and it worked! I walked across him a bajrillion times but he only woke up three times but that was enough and he didn't pop. So now I'm a Paper Holder Downer AND The Dad Holder Downer, plus tomorrow is Sit In The Box Day to make sure they don't take my special box outside with the other boxes and stuff. I think I should be a very tired kitty by now with all the work I have to do. All Max does is eat and sleep and lick himself and write, and that's not a whole lot, I don't think.
I know I haven't blogged in a long long time and I keep saying that but I've been very very busy because I have a job as the Paper Holder Downer and the Mom has had lots of papers for me to hold down, plus I have to spend a lot of time sitting in my special box to make sure no one throws it away but tonight is the night the Dad takes all the trash out and was in the box so he didn't take it, so I don't have to worry about anyone throwing my box away tonight, and Max says it's some kind of record for keeping a box because I've had it for like 2 years, or maybe a month, but it's been a long time and I'm very happy!